A few weeks back, I came across this blog post on what is considered good enough, and even now, it stuck in my head. For those who know me best, they know that I struggle with perfectionism, always wanting to “be better,” and trying to fit the silver square into the gold triangular hole. Terrible but true metaphors; where this all started, no one knows, and there’s no point in really trying to figure out at this point – I’m in my twenties, and I am a recovering perfectionist…a recovering perfectionist who has had to take ownership of the fact that I am simply not perfect, and try as I might, I will never be perfect, but I will always be good enough.
Society tells young women that they need to be skinner, blonder, more brunette, tanner, wear more makeup, have longer hair, be smarter, work harder, make more money, get married young (to a handsome looking man in my case, but that looks different for many others) and be a stay at home mother. Men are told they are valuable when they’re tall, dark, handsome, financially valuable, have a great job, intelligent, articulate, hard working, buff, drive a nice car, have gone to an Ivy League School, and are able to play in the NFL. When you don’t fit into either category or are somewhere in between or nowhere in between, the desire to be good enough becomes heightened again.
Self-worth is not defined by physical appearance, nor by emotional capability, nor by social capacity. It is cannot be confined, but is unbounded by the simple fact that Christ died on the cross for humanity – for those who saw themselves as too good, those who were judged as not good enough, and everyone in between. Faith makes it possible to see it that it is possible to be good enough – not for everything that I’m not and cannot be in this world, but for everything that I will be in the world to come. If I truly believe that God created humanity in God’s image, and was willing to sacrifice His only Son to reconcile the created world to Himself, then my flaws, which are lowly and of a fallen nature, should be of the least of my concern. This God was willing to go to the very edge to get the world back for all time, and did so on my behalf as well.
These flaws, these things I don’t necessarily love about myself, yes, well, we all have them. Welcome to the curse of humanity. Only God gets to be perfect, and fortunately, there is only one of those. But as I see it, this God, this one, all-loving, all-gracious, omnipotent God sees past these imperfections and flaws to constantly remind each and every one of His creation that day in and day out, YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH. God has not forsaken us, nor has He decided to give up any of His promises, and that should be indication enough that YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH in the eyes of the ONLY ONE who matters in this world.
Yes, yes, I know I’m supposed to preach a message of self-acceptance, and that too matters; your opinion of yourself does matter, far more than anyone else’s
I will always struggle to see myself as good enough, smart enough, perfect enough; but what is most critical is to recognize for all my flaws (and including all my flaws, which are in fact, not flaws), I was created in the image of God, and am therefore just about as perfect as I could be and should be. I can’t be any better physically, intellectually or emotionally, but I sure as heck could be better in my relationship with God, and relatively, in my relationship with others.
I don’t need to see flaws as “good enough.” But what is most important is that when I wake up in the morning, I recognize that this day is good enough, my friends are good enough, my walk with God is good enough, what I have is good enough, my family is good enough, and all my blessings – even the difficult ones – are good enough. Those are the very things that make me “me.” And therefore, I AM GOOD ENOUGH. It is a nearly impossible task some days, but it is a mantra I am willing to work at, and therefore, something that is worthy, worthwhile, and a cross I am willing to bear with God at my side.
Thanks be to God!
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